Official site of Tribune News serving Tomball, Magnolia and Waller

The sun began to move lower into the sky and the wind that had been blowing all day was beginning to subside. It has been a good day. Here I now rested under the shade of the big oak tree in the middle of the pasture and not a soul around but for me, myself and I. I grabbed my thermos of coffee I had in my truck and pulled up a chair to the still standing table and began to enjoy a place that is near and dear to my heart, the Family Ranch.
All the guys had left and I was finishing up my cleaning duties and began to just really chill out. As I sat in the silence of nature a few deer appeared in the distance no longer disturbed by the many, many shotguns that had been hammering away at clay targets just an hour or two before. I enjoyed the coffee and then after tying up a few loose ends I climbed back into my truck for my trip home about an hour away.
I had invited the men of my church up to the ranch for a great time of manly fellowship. As I surveyed the crowd that had gathered earlier in the day I suddenly observed that I think I have now become an official, old man in the crowd. I do believe I was the eldest of them all and it brought me pleasure to share with these guys a place that I enjoy. I looked over at my son during the day and realized he will someday be the leader of the festivities up here if he so desires.
Our goal for the day was to shoot some skeet and I had made preparations for twenty to thirty people. I have to admit that I skipped Sunday Morning Church services to make the preparations for everybody and I hope the Lord forgives me. The game plan was for all the guys to head out in a caravan after church being lead by my son and then as soon as they arrived I was to have lunch prepared for immediate consumption. I had purposely kept everyone in the dark about the menu for several reasons. First of all, I know men well enough that they will eat just about anything anybody will make if they are hungry enough and I knew they would be hungry right after church. Not that church makes anybody hungry now mind you, but church always seems to let out just a few minutes after my normal lunch time. Secondly I didn't share the menu because this brings down too many suggestions. The women were not invited and without the women we men can do just about anything we want with our meals. The tables don't have to have center pieces or table cloths, the food doesn't have to be a balanced meal and the food can be cooked as spicy as we want. I did hear however, a few of the guys make comments as to how lost they felt without the women being there.
After we had our lunch time prayer I simply told the guys to help themselves and dig in. I had grilled some sausage and tube steaks and had a choice of bread, bun, flour tortilla or simply a sausage on a stick. It was their choice to create whatever they wanted with the food at hand. Some of them said they were lost. They couldn't hear any woman telling them how to make their plate, what to eat and not eat and to watch dripping grease on their shirt. They even commented about how quiet it was with no talking during the meal. We all simply ate good greasy food and listened to the end of the football game on the car radios with no talking interruptions. The guys had thought all female influence had passed us by that day until I suddenly saw Matt using PINK SHOTGUN SHELLS! I just about died when I saw PINK SHOTGUN SHELLS at the ranch. I could not believe it and they really did not improve his shooting very much either. Actually, after watching this group shoot, I don't think a crook has anything to worry about. David won the grand prize. Ed came in a one shot second. I gave David a cheap gimmie calculator that I have had in my closet for ten years. Actually I gave him two of them. Ed's prize for second place was; not having to carry around a piece of junk that probably did not work anyhow.
Everything had gone real well for me during the earlier part of the day. The fire in my pit was able to burn down quickly enough to put the sausage on at a good even heat and everything fell into place very well except when something literally fell that I haven't told anybody about until now. Well, something fell on the ground. Actually a whole pan of sausage fell onto the ground but I followed the old standby five second rule. I quickly picked it up and thoroughly washed it off before returning it to the pit for reheating --- or maybe I didn't really. You will never know….
Thanks guys for the good memories.


 - Clifford