Preachers are human. Some people tend to forget that occasionally. They laugh, they cry, they are happy and can be sad. They also have families and when a child is born, a whole new set of rules come into play with the kids.

Potty training, back talking, arguing with siblings, school problems, girlfriend or boyfriend problems, an extra car…all those things come into play regardless of our position in life and families that grow up as “preachers kids” are no different.

Take the story of RT. Now, RT told me he did not want his full named used, so I am respecting his wish.

RT’s daddy was a preacher. His dad was known in the day as a “silver tongued orator.” His dad could turn a Bible story into a 3D movie event in your mind. He could make you feel like the waters of the Red Sea were about to engulf you or the pillars of fire were about to singe the hair off your neck. He was just that kind of man. A great man, a great orator and expounder of the gospel.

As good speakers become better known they are invited to many locations to speak and this was the case with RT’s dad. He had been called out of town to speak at a special event and, for some reason, RT was invited to go along with his mom and dad to attend this very special function.

It was one of those coat and tie events and everybody was all fancied up in their Sunday Best. Of course, RT was required to wear a coat and tie, too. To the best of his recollection, he was only 6 or 7 years old at the time, so his life’s experiences had not developed with a clear understanding yet, so he was somewhat taken aback by the whole grandeur of the event.

Being the guest speaker, the family was, of course, invited to sit at the head table along with many other dignitaries. But for some reason, young RT was separated from his parents. He was relegated to the end of the table and was somewhat alone, although he was still on stage. He was near, but out of the direct control of his parents and the entire event seemed overwhelming.

Why so many forks? How come we have so many glasses on the table? What is this for? Why that? There were too many unanswered questions, but he did his best as the meal progressed.

As the meal was winding down, his dad was about to speak as the Master of Ceremonies began his introduction. At this time, the wait staff began the process of providing finger bowls to the entire crowd and it very likely had a touch of lemon in it. (Now I know that most of us will simply wipe our finger on our pants.) As the Minister Dad began to move toward the podium, the crowd began to burst out in laughter and the stunned Minister glanced around the room wondering why everybody was laughing.

As he looked from side to side, there was young RT at the end of the table with the finger bowl in both hands and bottoms up as RT was enjoying a fresh drink of this lemon water from the finger bowl. I guess he is still wondering why they served lemon juice in a bowl and not in a glass! So much for the finer things to a preacher’s kid.

Another short funny story was about a pastor’s grandson named Isaac. Isaac was visiting his grandmother for an Easter meal at Grandma’s house. Grandma had purchased some Peeps, you know those little marshmallow chicks, and had placed them in the center of each plate as an Easter decoration.

Before the meal began, little Isaac ran to the table and grabbed his Peep and just before he devoured it, Grandma caught him.

“No, No Isaac! You can’t have that now! You have to clean your plate before you can eat that!”

Little Isaac looked somewhat puzzled staring back at Grandma and the little wheels in his mind began to turn. He politely picked up his napkin, wiped his unused plate with the napkin and proudly smiled back at Grandma. Yes, he got to eat his Peep before his meal because he did what Grandma told him to do. He cleaned his plate!

Your’s truly will be sharing some of my stories on April 13 at the Montgomery County Fair Senior Citizen’s Day. I’m supposed to start at 9 a.m. Come join us for some laughs at the Montgomery County Convention Center.

Clifford

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