When I told the story of the drunk on the plane and the trouble he tried to cause, Wayne the window washer asked me what happened to him. I recalled a trip my wife and I took several years ago. It was a short trip to Las Vegas. We are not big spenders when it comes to entertainment and quite frankly we usually play the penny and nickel slot machines. I enjoy the buffets and when we got home we had actually spent about $60 for our three days of entertainment including food. We usually limit ourselves to $100 and you can pull a lot of nickel arms on a hundred dollars. We figure money is too hard to come by to waste it in a machine.

Being self-employed and both of us working together in the same business doesn’t leave us much time off. We were glad to get a day out of the office.

I’m just glad the drunk went to sleep. I am a very patient man and am not prone to anger, but I told my wife if he didn’t quit talking nasty and mouthing off to everybody I felt a very strong urge to help his lips swell up so he couldn’t talk anymore, if you get my drift. I can honestly say I have never, ever hit another human being with my fist. I’m not a fighter and I don’t loose my temper, but this guy was really getting to me. I can say without a doubt I have really, really only been angry five times in my lifetime. One of these days I may share them with you.

Our trip on the ground went real well. We had a very enjoyable time together. We walked and talked and actually got to have a conversation with each other without the phone ringing or someone interrupting us.

The two of us can enjoy a vacation without really planning anything special. We are the type of couple that can arrive at our destination and never really plan anything. We purposely do not plan any schedules as we are both very flexible in what we decide to do and we just enjoy walking around looking at things.

My wife enjoys mall and store settings. I enjoy people watching and looking at the building design and construction. A clothes rack of new outfits makes her happy. Staring at a nut and bolt the size of a man’s head allows study for me. A whole row of shoes to look at keeps her entertained. Freaks and geekie people give me laughter. Together we can both go to the same locations and each of us can fall into our own world of inner entertainment. The only problem, however, is my wife sometimes accuses me of rushing her.

I can be minding my own business leaning against a rack of women’s underwear or something when she suddenly announces it’s time to go. Her body language tells me she’s peeved at me for something and when I ask her why we’re leaving so quickly she says because I’m rushing her. She says she can tell by the way I stand that I’m bored, when really and truly all I did was shift my weight from one foot to the other, or if I sigh about something she thinks it means I’m ready to go. I quit trying to figure her out many, many years ago. I guess that’s why we have been happily married so long.

The plane trip home brought another first for both of us. As we found our seats on the plane, low and behold we sat next to Linda and David with the same seating arrangement we had on our first flight up. This was a couple I mentioned in my last story. We were in different row numbers, but the side by side seating was the same. As I looked around I then began to notice the other people in front of us were the same too. As I scanned the empty seat where the drunk was first sitting, I suddenly heard his voice coming from the backside of the plane and I thought he was about to sit in the same spot, but his new seat was on the far side of the plane and away from us. When I first heard him I was about to become upset, but when I saw him I could tell this guy wasn’t drunk anymore. I figured three days in Las Vegas, he was bound to have stayed drunk the whole time, but he was actually funny. He was spewing out funny clean jokes left and right. I kept an eye on him as we made our flight and the people sitting next to him actually seemed to enjoy his company. I guarantee this guy could talk the horns off a Billy goat.

Clifford

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