When I visited his office he promised me the shot would not hurt and, quite frankly, I was very surprised, ’cause it didn’t!

I began thinking of my feet and the trouble we have caused each other over the years. My feet have caused me trouble and I have always caused them trouble, too! Doing things with my feet I wasn’t supposed to do usually caused them a lot of pain.

My feet have taken me places I shouldn’t have gone. They took me swimming in a muddy pond when I was only 3 or 4 years old. They took me bicycle riding without permission. They made me go to parties when I got older that I wasn’t supposed to go to.

They made me walk to the store counter to buy my first cigars when I was only 13. They made me sneak around to buy chewing tobacco and they made me try to peel out in my parent’s car. They made me skip school and they made me run from my Grandpa Parker.

They also made me try to burn a large T in Magnolia High School’s football field. My feet have made me do a lot of bad things.

In return, I have caused my feet many problems too! I stuck my foot in a muddy hole full of glass only to have a piece of glass lodged in my foot for several days before I realized it was there. I used to stain my feet up with mulberry juice when I would run around barefooted.

I would cause my feet extra pain when I would step on a sticker and not stop to take it out until it had embedded itself so deep we had to dig it out with a needle. I guess the worst thing I did to my feet was the time I went swimming in Spring Creek behind Date Thomas’ house and cut my big toe muscle on something sharp in the water. I just wrapped it up in my dirty sock and went on about my playing. I cut the muscle and can only bend my toe one way.

My feet have abused me and I have abused them as well. It’s been a good relationship thus far, and I think I’ll keep them for a few more years.

One of the funniest sets of footwork I saw, however, was by a man I will never get to meet. Many years ago I was driving a truck and cattle trailer rig on the streets of Houston. Several blocks ahead of me on a long, straight stretch of road I saw a silhouette of a man jaywalking across the street.

This street was a double lane street both ways with a large grass esplanade in the middle. There was plenty of road room and the man crossing the road had adequate time to get to the other side before the cars got too close to him.

As he stepped off the curb, I began to sense this particular fellow was a slothful kind of guy. His steps were lazy. He had a very distinct mannerism of slouching while he walked. His head bobbled back and forth as he moved. His clothes were baggy and his hat was tilted with the bill to one side. His hands were in his pockets and his entire body language told me as I approached him that he really didn’t care he was jaywalking. He didn’t even appear to care the cars were approaching him.

I began a slow deceleration of the rig I was driving and the lead car next to me began to do the same. Regardless of how close we approached, this fellow gave me the impression he purposely intended to make the traffic stop for him as he illegally crossed the road.

I was laughing to myself at the slowness of this individual and as I got closer to him, I noticed he was walking on the back heel of his shoes. He finally got close to the curb on the esplanade and actually hesitated for a split second daring the traffic to get real close to him.

I was in a tired, giddy mood that afternoon and I felt this fellow needed some encouragement. As the trailer wheels passed the backside of this guy I reached down and locked the brakes on the trailer wheels causing them to lock up and squeal. When I did this, the fellow in an instant was catching air with his feet trying to get out of the way!

His body was now leaning backwards as his feet were trying to move him forward. He was actually running in place and couldn’t move. He was moving his legs so fast and hard his knees appeared to be beating him in the chest! His head was reared back so far his hat fell off! He was high steppin’!

As I looked in my side mirror as I passed this fellow, I have to say, I laughed and laughed at this guy who at first appeared to be slow and lazy suddenly catching air with his feet and not going anywhere.

Now I know some of you are going to think I shouldn’t have done this to this guy, and I guess in hindsight you’re probably right, but think about the good that came from this. It gave me another chapter in my life’s story for you to read about and it gave him a chance to tell all his friends how mad he was at me. It made conversation for the both of us. I’m sure his prayer would have been, “feet don’t fail me now!’”

Clifford

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